I had really grand plans for posting on 1/1 and talking about my resolutions and all that, but … I don’t know what happened. I wound up taking down our Christmas stuff and spent the day focused on cleaning every surface of my house.

Jon and I spent the next day having our annual “plan day.” We get out calendars and budgets and spreadsheets and essentially plan the year. We talk about what needs to happen, what trips need to be taken, etc. Works really well for us. We’ve been doing it for years. Life is less hectic now that he doesn’t travel so much, but we’re planners – so we plan.

My primary resolution this year: To live again – not just survive.

I’m ready. Classes are ending (end of April!), I have a dissertation plan, MC is growing up and things are more routine at home, etc. I have the mental space to move forward now.

So … There will definitely be a renewed focus on health.

I don’t exactly know what that means just yet – but I want to enjoy exercise again and I want to just … focus on feeling well – mind AND body.
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I got an apple watch for Christmas (from Jon) and it totally feeds my love of tracking (health) numbers, so that’s been fun.

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I’m still playing around with it and figuring it all out, but I like a good goal – and I love to have reminders constantly available. It’s perfect for building new focus. Fun AND helpful.

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I’ve made a point to get at least 3 miles in since the day after Christmas and have been successful (except yesterday was just 2 because it was getting dark and creepy on the greenway and I was alone). It’s surprising how motivating something as simple as a watch prompt can be.

I’m also officially back to the trainer and to boot camp.

As far as food goes? Just need to stop eating so much shit. We’ve been eating pizza and Mexican food and other quick stuff WAY too much.

We really like food and like each other, obv, so our plan is to stick to a night out together once a week (just the 2 of us) – and to try a new (to us) restaurant each time. I’m already making a list. Should be fun.

I just want life to sloooow down. And I want more fun and adventure.

I’m ready to prioritize that.
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I had my annual dermatology whole body check yesterday and the skin woes continue.

I had another spot blasted off my face (after a couple of weeks of topical medication that wasn’t doing anything). Fortunately the spot was much smaller and is consequently not so blistery.

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I’m all freaked out, though, because a mole on my back pretty substantially grew (after zero growth all other years) and passed the 7mm mark that apparently triggers concern regarding melanoma.

So … that’s off to be biopsied and I spent a significant portion of last night googling and freaking myself out EVEN THOUGH I KNOW BETTER.

I also have a spot on my foot that they “watch” every year – but it’s off to be biopsied, too, even though it didn’t grow.

They always tell me about the ABCDE rule:

“The ABCDE rule is another guide to the usual signs of melanoma. Be on the lookout and tell your doctor about spots that have any of the following features:

A is for Asymmetry: One half of a mole or birthmark does not match the other.
B is for Border: The edges are irregular, ragged, notched, or blurred.
C is for Color: The color is not the same all over and may include shades of brown or black, or sometimes with patches of pink, red, white, or blue.
D is for Diameter: The spot is larger than 6 millimeters across (about ¼ inch – the size of a pencil eraser), although melanomas can sometimes be smaller than this.
E is for Evolving: The mole is changing in size, shape, or color.”

My foot meets A, B & C. My back meets D & E.

I will be SO FUCKING PISSED if I’m sideswiped by gd skin cancer.

This stuff if pretty much occupying my thoughts right now, especially since I have cancer paranoia ANYWAY.

I’m going to stop googling, though.

The internet is the best/worst thing that’s ever happened to me.
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How about a cute baby picture?

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This is his reaction when I climb into his tent with him:

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Yeah, I never say no.

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