The good:

1) Jon received the results from the genetic testing. His cancer = a freak thing. I have been extremely stressed about this and thought I would feel immense relief at learning it’s not a genetic thing – AND I DO – but it’s a little unsettling to think my otherwise perfectly healthy and YOUNG husband who has no family history of colorectal (or much other, really) cancer just randomly grew a tumor. I need EXPLANATIONS.

2) I SO love my new job. I definitely made the right decision.

My only hesitation was the almost 2 hour per day round-trip commute (into a very rural community) – but it’s not so bad. I’m only two weeks in, but I wake up excited every morning – and the drive is simple/no traffic and quite scenic – and I appreciate the time to unwind and switch gears before being home each night – so no complaints yet.

I love working in community mtl hlth and feel very lucky to be working for an agency dedicated to the underserved. I found my people, for sure.

3) I’m eating again.

The bad:

1) Long drive to Memphis happening soon for my grandmother’s funeral.

2) It’s supposed to snow. Around here, that’s a big deal that could make me a very grumpy traveler.

The mixed:

1) I haven’t seen my youngest brother in over a year, but he flew up from FL for my grandmother’s funeral. Sad occasion – but I’m excited to see him.

He was a teenager when my mom and step-father moved to Key West, so he went with them. My mom came back to TN when my step-father died and recently moved back into her home of many years once renters moved, etc., but this kid (he’s 22 now) stayed down there in an apartment of his own, works full-time as a gov’t contractor and is taking classes at the community college with plans to transfer later when he’s tired of KW.

I hear tales of clubs and random debauchery … but I’m so impressed he doesn’t spend his days drunk on a beach because he SO could have gone that route. So proud.

2) I’m 1.5 pounds away from officially making it to 100 pounds.

On one hand – this is something I’m happy about, obv. While not the end of the road – and likely already achieved since 272 is just my highest recorded weight – it’s something I once thought would be impossible. It’s a big deal to me. A good thing.

On the other – I’m pulling the scale out before it has time to gather dust. I also felt a little twinge of disappointment the other day when I realized my stomach revolt might be over. That’s not a good thing. At all.

Jon is hovering right around 198ish and told me the other day that he never thought he’d see the day that I’d weigh almost 25 pounds less than him. Realistically – I didn’t, either. We spent SO much time competing and/or weighing the same and/or listening to me complain about how easy it is for him – but I can’t remember now when I passed him up. Feels like it just happened.

I guess that’s a testament to how little emphasis I’ve put on my weight recently?

A long time ago, I decided that I really wanted Vibram FiveFingers – so that became my 100 loss “reward” that I actually stuck to (meaning I didn’t buy them on a whim) – but I lost interest long ago.

I feel like I should do something to celebrate/reward the achievement, but I’m not really feeling all that interested in bothering. I might actually become one of those people who rewards weight loss with food – disobeying advice from everybody who thinks they know everything about weight loss.

This restaurant restriction resolution SUCKS.