I haven’t had regular internet access (well, except for my phone) for the past 10 days. I probably would have seriously stressed and died of shock or boredom under normal circumstances but I have been SO BUSY. With like … life.
Our FL fun ended and my mom and I flew to Memphis to move her back here – Jon to Atlanta (to be with his family for the holiday).
My mom has some really nice friends who picked us up at the airport at 9pm on Christmas Eve (!) and let us stay with them for the night and were very gracious and kind and all of that – but Christmas itself sort of sucked. I wasn’t really too worked up about not being with Jon since we’re pretty accustomed to that, but it was seriously depressing/sad to lie in a strange bed on Christmas morning and listen to a family do the Santa thing/open gifts/have fun together.
It was the memories of past years and the unrealized plans we’d had for this year and the forever changed future (most especially for my mom) that got me.
The moving truck arrived the day after Christmas (Sunday) – so we’ve spent the week unpacking/shopping for furniture/waiting for deliveries and installations/cleaning/getting my mom settled.
I am so sore. My FINGERS hurt.
Also? My pants are so tight I’m considering flying home in pajamas.
I’ve got the life part mostly together. Eating? Not so much.
Turns out it’s just WAY easy to eat cookies for dinner when the alternative creates work/mess amidst complete exhaustion. (Though I did end up eating a salad and baked potato tonight – so I’m making progress.)
I AM NOT TOTALLY FALLING APART, THOUGH.
I have no choice – I am NOT buying bigger sizes. That’s one thing I told myself I’d never do – and I’m not. Period.
I recognize that constant “blips” will lead to total failure – and I recognize that I’m having a lot of those blips lately.
This has been a hard year.
I was supposed to go home (MI) Sunday, but I changed my mind/flight and am leaving tomorrow instead to meet Jon in TN before going back to MI. I need some downtime at home to get my own life together before classes/work start again next week.
And I miss Jon. And the dog. I’m homesick.
I feel like I’m abandoning my mom, but I know she will be fine.