So, Food, Inc.
I spent a few portions of the movie with my hands over my eyes … and I left feeling like I might never be able to eat again … but it was fabulous. I highly, highly recommend it.
One unintended consequence – it brought the internal struggle I have re: meat/animal products to the surface. I eat meat now and I like it … mostly. I don’t eat meat off of bones (and just recently even relinquished and started being ok with meat on bones, in general) and I don’t eat anything that looks like its source.
I essentially need to be able to pretend that what I’m eating wasn’t once a living/breathing creature. If I can do that – I can handle it.
I’m not really proud of that. In fact, it sort of disgusts me. I think about it quite a bit … especially when I’m confronted with the realities of meat production/processing … but I don’t know what to do about it. I know I’m choosing to stick my head in the sand just so my needs are met. I’m not ok with that … but I do nothing.
We go way out of our way to buy meat that is grass-fed/natural/organic and all that jazz – which is good, I guess – but again … it’s mostly about my needs. When I think about it on a very basic level, everything I look for – grass-fed, organic, free range, local farms, etc. – it all has to do with my nutritional needs and/or guilt. I mean, really … inhumane treatment is not ok, but killing the animal and eating it is?
I’m (probably) not going to stop eating meat – these feelings have been around for a while – I’m just very conflicted and haven’t reconciled a lot of things yet. I don’t even know how to adequately describe what it is that bothers me (obviously) … I just know I feel as if I’m doing something wrong when I eat meat – I know better (?) and I choose to ignore that.
(What’s the deal with so many grocery stores/markets calling meat ‘protein’ these days? One place I saw actually had a list of their ‘protein options’ listed along with ‘dairy options’ etc. I guess I’m not the only person who recognizes/desires some disconnecting … )
Uhhh … anyway …
Breakfast was the same as always:
Lunch was VERY quick. I mixed tuna with 2T buttermilk dill dressing and the rest of a red onion and plopped all of that on top of lettuce. I threw in a babybel cheese and some pistachios, too.
It occurred to me today that I never photograph what I drink – for good reason, I guess – it’s boring. I drink 2 things: water and black coffee. I will occasionally get (unsweetened) tea at a restaurant … and I sometimes feel rebellious enough to drink a coke … but not often at all – can’t even remember the last time.
We skipped pilates and stayed home to work on yard stuff, so we had another quick dinner. Jon picked up a chicken from a nearby restaurant (not a rotisserie chicken, but similar – a whole smoked chicken).
His version – and a perfect example of what I CAN’T eat:
My snack tonight = a few of these pecans. I love them so much I just barely rolled my eyes at the ‘evaporated cane juice.’
Our first harvest!
I’m at 1,841 calories, 113g fat, 97g carbs, 123g fat – and I’m done for the day.